The Registry

Well before I dive into the subject matter stated in my title, I would just like to mention that it is 26 degrees today, but feels like 3 degrees.  I would also like to be the first to say that this is too cold. 


The Registry:

Well to be honest it's totally overwhelming & nothing like my experience with my wedding registry.  My thoughts are that by the time I was preparing my wedding registry I had 25 year of experience with utensils, plates & small kitchen appliances.  Prior to getting pregnant I thought the baby registry would be a cinch.  Um, not the case.  For starters the crib.  Should be easy right.  Well it's not.  We know that we want it to be white.  We prefer modern hardwood furniture with eco-friendly glues & paints.  Okay, well that's crazy expensive.  I wish it wasn't a luxury to be environmentally conscience.  Honestly living sustainably should be available to all of us. 

Now lets just move onto the stroller.  I'm a city mom (to be), so what's most important to me...weight.  I found a stroller that was only 12 lbs!  So exciting.  However, it did not recline.  I've been informed that this is not an attribute one looks for in a stroller.  Now that one's out.  So on Sunday, Darren & I went to Babies-R-Us to start a registry & to test drive some strollers.  We were most interested in looking at the Maxi-Cosi Perle (weighing in at 17.0 lbs) & the MacLaren Triumph (weighing in at 11.0 lbs).  For us, the Maxi-Cosi won.  Here's why.  The Maxi-Cosi Infant car seat snaps in & out very easily.  And the 90 degree angled framed stroller can support a diaper bag without tipping over when the child is not occupying the stroller seat.  So it's heavier, but still one of the lighter & more compact strollers on the market.  Oh yeah, compact is important too since we live in a 2 bedroom apartment in Brooklyn with no proper storage closet.  

Now within the store we moved onto the bathing section.  Okay, this should be easy.  Nope.  Not easy either.  Well the baby's got to be cleaned.  Darren actually asked how often we have to wash the baby.  His argument, "well it's not like the baby is out getting dirty like the dogs.  Yes, true my love, but we still have to give the baby a bath."  Okay so he's still not totally sold on the necessity of bathing our future child, but he agrees to zap one of the tubs.  Now which one.  Well there is this super cool tricked out tub that allows you to know the water temp, but it's way too big for our home.  So we zap a little collapsible mesh thingy.  The baby in the photo with it's genitals covered by a wash cloth looks happy. 

With Darren & I both starting to fade & feeling overwhelm by how long it took us to make a decision on just these three items so far, stroller, infant car seat & infant bather, we decide to push on to one last section & then we must break for lunch.  Infant feeding...Uuhh?  Lets just start with the Breast Pumps.  Do I need to double down while pumping or will pumping one at time work for me?  I don't have a full time job, but even still I can't deny the efficiency of pumping two boobs at once.  Then there are the multiple brand choices.  Okay okay okay, so there's Medela (it's mega expensive), so that's the one I need right?  Is it the best?  Is it really worth the high ticket price?  I don't know?  Again this whole thing is not like comparing one 18/10 Stainless Cutlery with another 18/10 brand.  I don't know what to do.  In an effort to make a decision that will result in us eating lunch soon, Darren zaps the cheapest brand.  I think it was Playtex, but to be honest I'd have to log on to our registry to be sure.  By this point I was delirious.  We can change it later he says, as he begins to make moves for the exit. 

But wait, we then were both pulled in by the diaper pails.  Well the diaper topic is a whole other can of worms that I have been slowing opening.  Again, it goes back to my Eco roots.  I know I don't want to deal with cloth diapers.  I just don't, okay people.  Other Eco people please don't judge.  Then there are all of the eco-friendly diaper options in the disposable diaper land.  Where do I began.  I've read reviews.  Every one of them contradicts the other.  Some people say they are too scratchy.  Others say that they aren't "really" biodegradable.  Some say they only work with girls, that the boys penis some how causes the diapers to spring a leak.  Then there are flushable variety.  Quite frankly it just makes me want to give in & conform to the easy to use, kid tested, mother approved, regular earth damaging diaper variety.  Which I'm still not sure if I'm going to give in.  I'm just frustrated by the process of discovery.  Anyhow, we looked at diaper pails.  Compared the price on the pail itself & the price of the refill bags, so on & so forth.  Darren zapped the Arm & Hammer Diaper Pail & a few refill bags, and then we went back to the registry table to return the gun.

Exhausted & sent home with a goody bag, we left the store knowing only two things for sure, our stroller & infant car seat were good choices.  However if someone were to inform me that our choices were in fact terrible, well then we would be back to square one.  See what I mean.  Absolutely no experience equates to an inability to make sound decisions.  The moral of my story is that Darren & I are a case of the blind leading the blind.  Neither of us has any idea of what will be right for us as parents or for our baby once it enters into our world. 

The Honeymoon vs. Oh No What Have I Done

I'm about two weeks into my second trimester & it really is the honeymoon period. I feel as if someone flipped a switch & all of a sudden I felt fantastic again. My appetite has returned, but is not yet amped up. My overly sensitive nose has backed down, and overall I feel great.

I've now started my prenatal yoga. It truly is amazing to be around other pregnant women. I find that my prenatal class is more of an exercise in breath & spirituality. Where my regular yoga class focuses on strength & endurance. I'll stick with both because each class challenges me in unique & equally important ways. Worry not friends my regular yoga teacher modifies the poses for me.

Now that my physical symptoms of pregnancy have dissipated, I am left with my thinking self. Currently my main issue of complaint is my own head space. I continue to feel anxiety toward the unknown experience. And I worry about the pain. I am working diligently to free myself from many years of frightening stories my mother choose to share with me. Currently I am reading Birthing From Within, in an effort to wipe the slate clean. It helps & certainly calms me down. Yesterday I watched a birth story (I know I am not suppose to do this because they dramatize everything), but this one was a comparison between a L&D birth and a Birthing Center birth at St. Luke's Roosevelt, where we are to deliver our baby. The L&D doctor was my girlfriend's doctor & the Birthing Center was a midwife whom I did not know. Anyhow, watching it brought all of my fears to the surface; leaving me with a lump in my throat. Darren & I talk about it. And he reassures me that my anxieties are normal. And I know this to be true, but come June it's me who will be left with the difficult task of delivering our baby. And currently I'm feeling overwhelmed.

12 weeks & Expanding

Thanksgiving has come & gone. Sharing & celebrating our news with family has left us with many great memories. Darren took the liberty of starting the conversation by announcing that I had expanded my business to include taking pictures of babies. Then he showed everyone our 11 week & 1 day old baby's sonogram. JoAnn start to cry, Devon said "I knew it", & my brother Rob had a great delayed reaction that was priceless. My niece told her mom privately that she hoped that I would have a baby girl, but that she didn't want to say that to me because she didn't want me to feel any pressure. I love the sweetness of little girls. My nephew Matthew hopes for a boy, because he's a boy, naturally. Lauren had figured it out & confirmed with Darren a few hours before dinner. She considerately chose to speak to Darren rather than me, just in case I was in fact not pregnant & just putting on some winter weight. Later that evening we called our family that was not present for the big reveal. Pop Pop, who will soon be turning 89, was thrilled to find out that he would be a Great Grandfather for the 4th time. My Aunt Trish was also excited & shared the news with her children. Jessica then sent a text congratulating us from her, her brother & dad. Darren's father Larry & Grandmother were also very happy & excited for us. And then the longest lead up to our big news occurred with the rest of Darren's family in NC. We wanted to share the news by video chat, but after an hour of attempting to connect we just emailed the picture. We were on speaker phone & could hear everyone in the room scream. It was very heart warming. Again many well wishes from the group. In the days that have followed the news has spread & trickled down to others & we continue to receive calls & emails from our family & friends. This is an exciting time for us all.